So, I'm watching Midnight Meat Train right now, because I'm the kind of person who watches horror movies at 10 am. I thought this was going to be a very promising movie, but...It sucks so far. I'm just about halfway through it, and I'm bored. So I thought I'd write a little bit about it.
Eight people have died so far, and it's STILL not interesting. These characters have not even been introduced to us; I don't care so much if they die! The fourth kill, a little bit interesting, but still not very good. They've all pretty much died the same way, and there's almost no build-up.
There have sort of been two sex scenes so far, one of which involves the guy (I don't know his name because I don't care) pushing the girl (don't care about her name, either) over with a loud "THONK!" noise...It made me laugh so hard; it almost sounded like he cartoon-style knocked her out.
I couldn't really tell you what's going on right now, because it's really boring. The guy's a photographer, trying to capture gritty city life, and now...Now he's running away from a guy in a meat locker. I think I missed something.
Oh-oh-oh, now he's taking pictures of his girlfriend/pre-fiancée undressing, after she was like "OH MY GAWD STOP TAKING PICTURES OF THOSE HORRIBLE THINGS! TAKE PICTURES OF ME DON'T YOU LIKE ME PLEASE LIKE ME I LOVE YOU!!!" So he's taking the pictures of her, but he's remembering all the things that have happened while he's been taking the other pictures and he's like "I can't do it!" and she gets all upset because she thinks it's because she's fat or something (I don't know).
God this is stupid. But I have to finish it.
SKIP THIS MOVIE.
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Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Um...What? Pulse (JP) Review
(x-posted to my Japanese culture and language blog, konnichiwhat?)
Pulse (or Kairo, its Japanese name) is a J-Horror movie directed by Kiyoshi Kurosawa.
Pulse follows several Japanese college students who...Do stuff...One of them dies...And then this other guy doesn't know how to use a computer and contacts the dead through the internet somehow...And...Yeah...
Okay, this movie was really hard for me to follow.
People are killing themselves, and there's a website that asks his guy if he wants to meet a ghost, and there's a forbidden room and some red tape that makes ghosts go away and the city is pretty much empty of people, and (I will give away the ending because I don't even know if it counts as a spoiler) they end up on a boat trying to get away from whatever it is for some reason even though whatever it is is everywhere. That is all I got from this movie.
It's often said that Japanese horror is much more subtle and leaves more to the mind than western horror - this might have been a little much for me. I really don't have much to say about it. Perhaps a second round of viewing is necessary, but I feel kind of done with it.
I can't deny that it was pretty damn creepy at times, though. But Kairo is skippable, unless you are really into Japanese horror.
Read More......
Pulse (or Kairo, its Japanese name) is a J-Horror movie directed by Kiyoshi Kurosawa.
Pulse follows several Japanese college students who...Do stuff...One of them dies...And then this other guy doesn't know how to use a computer and contacts the dead through the internet somehow...And...Yeah...
Okay, this movie was really hard for me to follow.
People are killing themselves, and there's a website that asks his guy if he wants to meet a ghost, and there's a forbidden room and some red tape that makes ghosts go away and the city is pretty much empty of people, and (I will give away the ending because I don't even know if it counts as a spoiler) they end up on a boat trying to get away from whatever it is for some reason even though whatever it is is everywhere. That is all I got from this movie.
It's often said that Japanese horror is much more subtle and leaves more to the mind than western horror - this might have been a little much for me. I really don't have much to say about it. Perhaps a second round of viewing is necessary, but I feel kind of done with it.
I can't deny that it was pretty damn creepy at times, though. But Kairo is skippable, unless you are really into Japanese horror.
Read More......
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Someone needs to do something about that leak...Dark Water (JP, US) review
(x-posted to my Japanese blog, Konnichiwhat?)
Dark Water (仄暗い水の底から, Honogurai Mizu no Soko Kara) is a Japanese horror film by Hideo Nakata, the director of the Japanese Ringu movies. It is based on a Japanese short horror story by Koji Suzuki of the same name. There was a US remake of the movie as well (within this post).
Dark Water follows a mother's battle for custody of her daughter. Yoshimi Matsubara (Dahlia Williams US) rents a apartment for her and Ikuko (Ceci) to live in, but soon after notices a leak in the ceiling. The management is unhelpful, but it seems the leak is evidence of something bigger happening that threatens the lives of Yoshimi and her daughter.
Now, the US version of Dark Water was pretty similar to the Japanese version, actually; almost scene-for-scene until the end of the movie. But which one was better?
For starters, I much preferred the Japanese actresses for the mother and child. Yoshimi had a stressed, slightly psychotic, neurotic quality to her, while Dahlia was just neurotic. And the child? Ikuko was a thousand times more endearing than Ceci. 'Nuff said.
I have to say, I was a little lost by the ending of the Japanese version, though I think that maybe it's because I'm an idiot; after looking it up on Wikipedia it seemed pretty obvious. The epilogue was better in the Japanese version, though. I can't think of a spoiler-free reason to say why, so I'll leave it at that.
The effects were better in the US version, and more of them, though neither movie really depended on effects.
Overall, I think the Japanese version wins this round. If you can handle subtitles or dubbing, definitely check out the Japanese version of Dark Water.
Read More......
Dark Water (仄暗い水の底から, Honogurai Mizu no Soko Kara) is a Japanese horror film by Hideo Nakata, the director of the Japanese Ringu movies. It is based on a Japanese short horror story by Koji Suzuki of the same name. There was a US remake of the movie as well (within this post).
Dark Water follows a mother's battle for custody of her daughter. Yoshimi Matsubara (Dahlia Williams US) rents a apartment for her and Ikuko (Ceci) to live in, but soon after notices a leak in the ceiling. The management is unhelpful, but it seems the leak is evidence of something bigger happening that threatens the lives of Yoshimi and her daughter.
Now, the US version of Dark Water was pretty similar to the Japanese version, actually; almost scene-for-scene until the end of the movie. But which one was better?
For starters, I much preferred the Japanese actresses for the mother and child. Yoshimi had a stressed, slightly psychotic, neurotic quality to her, while Dahlia was just neurotic. And the child? Ikuko was a thousand times more endearing than Ceci. 'Nuff said.
I have to say, I was a little lost by the ending of the Japanese version, though I think that maybe it's because I'm an idiot; after looking it up on Wikipedia it seemed pretty obvious. The epilogue was better in the Japanese version, though. I can't think of a spoiler-free reason to say why, so I'll leave it at that.
The effects were better in the US version, and more of them, though neither movie really depended on effects.
Overall, I think the Japanese version wins this round. If you can handle subtitles or dubbing, definitely check out the Japanese version of Dark Water.
Read More......
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Disease Control - Quarantine Review
My friend told me to not see this movie. She absolutely begged. "It's horrible," she said. "So goddamn horrible." But I'm on a mission - I must be brave.
I saw Quarantine.
To be honest, I was expecting it to be worse. Oh, it was pretty bad, but most horror movies are nowhere near perfect; it's usually the cheesiness we like, isn't it?
Quarantine starts out in a firehouse where a woman is reporting the daily routine of the firemen, and also being all flirty and cute and stuff *giggle* Because she has personality or whatever. The firemen get a call in the night and she follows them to an apartment building, where Quarantine really begins. Instead of filming a routine emergency call, Miss Personality and her cameraman spend the night outrunning the effects of a highly violent disease.
Pretty much anything I say from this point on will spoil the movie, but really, the movie spoils itself. No one hazards a guess as to what the disease could be, even though it's ABSOLUTELY FREAKING OBVIOUS. It's a little insulting, really.
But there are good points about Quarantine. I liked that it didn't depend on gross-out moments, but they still had them in there. A few points could easily make someone jump. And, it was entertaining, I guess. Definitely no rewatch value, though.
Verdict: if you can find it on OnDemand for free or somehow not pay for it, go for it.
Read More......
I saw Quarantine.
To be honest, I was expecting it to be worse. Oh, it was pretty bad, but most horror movies are nowhere near perfect; it's usually the cheesiness we like, isn't it?
Quarantine starts out in a firehouse where a woman is reporting the daily routine of the firemen, and also being all flirty and cute and stuff *giggle* Because she has personality or whatever. The firemen get a call in the night and she follows them to an apartment building, where Quarantine really begins. Instead of filming a routine emergency call, Miss Personality and her cameraman spend the night outrunning the effects of a highly violent disease.
Pretty much anything I say from this point on will spoil the movie, but really, the movie spoils itself. No one hazards a guess as to what the disease could be, even though it's ABSOLUTELY FREAKING OBVIOUS. It's a little insulting, really.
But there are good points about Quarantine. I liked that it didn't depend on gross-out moments, but they still had them in there. A few points could easily make someone jump. And, it was entertaining, I guess. Definitely no rewatch value, though.
Verdict: if you can find it on OnDemand for free or somehow not pay for it, go for it.
Read More......
Thursday, May 14, 2009
You're safe under the covers...Right?
Hello, and welcome to my new blog! I'm not entirely satisfied with the title, so I'm not properly introducing it yet, but I think it's okay to start talking a little bit of what this blog is about.
Well, horror movies. I love 'em! I still haven't seen enough of them; sadly, even some classics have escaped me. So I'm basically going to be blogging through a bunch of horror films, and hopefully other horror related stuff as well.
The adventure starts soon... Read More......
Well, horror movies. I love 'em! I still haven't seen enough of them; sadly, even some classics have escaped me. So I'm basically going to be blogging through a bunch of horror films, and hopefully other horror related stuff as well.
The adventure starts soon... Read More......
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